See what had happened…
So I had a bit of an accident Friday morning, and I made a post on Facebook about getting into a fight with a wall and the floor and losing which prompted many questions about what happened. Since I’m a bit tired of repeating the story and I’m always up for poking fun at myself I’ll just explain what happened here, with the assistance of my awesome whiteboard and drawing skills. You bitches better recognize…
So there I was sleeping peacefully on the living room couch Friday morning. This is normal for me, since I don’t have a television in my room right now and I have trouble sleeping without one going in the background.

Sleep is pretty awesome!
Eventually my plan of sleeping in till the last possible minute was being foiled by both Travis walking around the living room and my Iphone’s alarm going off to tell me if I don’t get up now I will surely be late. It’s really very subtle…

Imagine it yelling at you, thats what it was doing!
Now I needed to get up, but before I get to that part let me show you the layout of the living room. Keep in mind this isn’t exactly scale, but you can get the rough idea. The front of the living room has 42 inch plasma HD television sitting on a steel stand that’s wedged between a corner closet and the stairs going up to the bedrooms. Please note the sharp pointy corner on the wall by the closet.

Living Room
Sorry about the lighting in the pic, I threw this little thing together pretty quick so don’t expect everything to be top notch here. I’m working with limited materials.
Anyway, what I did after shutting off my alarm was stand up by the right side of the couch really fast because I realized I had like two minutes to get ready and leave or I was going to be late. I felt a bit light headed when I stood up, and the last thing I remember is going to take a step forward… then everything went black. There was a huge noise, Travis came running into the living room from the kitchen (note his bald spot, I’m all about the details!) to see what just happened.

X was where I stood up
Now it doesn’t look like a long distance, but my scale is off. From where I stood to where I fell was probably 3-4 steps. I woke back up and looked up at Travis asking if I was alright…

The foggy view as I first regained conciousness
So when I stood up, I blacked out, fell forward taking a few steps to try and keep my balance and falling head first into the corner of pain. Based on the damage to my face, it appears that the right side of my face hit pretty flush against the corner and just missed the TV stand where I knocked a few blu-ray discs that were hanging off the edge off the rear of the stand. Then my head bounced on the tile floor and I rolled over onto my back where I regained consciousness. My response to Travis asking me if I was okay was “How did I get here?” and I was pretty confused and in a lot of pain.
I have a bruise that runs from the top right corner of my head all the way down my cheek, a red burn mark on the same cheek, and somehow I put a really bad bruise on my right earlobe. My knee was on fire and I discovered that I covered the entire top of my right knee with the worst carpet burn I’ve ever seen. Later I also discovered a really bad bruise on my left bicep from the fall. Travis said it sounded like I sprinted across the living room and dove head first into the wall, which is probably about how it happened. I’m really lucky I didn’t get bounced between the corner and the TV stand, or I could have been in much worse shape.
I got up and gimped around to get dressed and get to work on time, where Travis spent time telling everyone what happened and making fun of me for the day. I got checked out later in the day at a walk in clinic and the doctor told me it was probably just a momentary low blood pressure issue, though I checked out and everything was normal. She advised me to take my time getting out of bed. My face is telling me the same thing. Hopefully I won’t be picking anymore fights with walls & floors.
So to make myself feel better I offer up one last image for this entry, fortunately for everyone this isn’t one that I created on a small whiteboard. Hot redheads with huge boobs always cheer me up.

Christina Hendricks @ the Oscars
If you want to see more of her, check out the gallery at What Would Tyler Durden Do.
Until I write again…


