Excessive Variance

A while back I was looking for good podcasts to listen while at work and I ran through probably two dozen suggestions before I heard about the Dan Le Betard Show with Stugotz.   I was mildly familiar with Dan Le Betard from his guest appearances on PTI and other appearances on various ESPN programs.   I was hoping to find some simple  entertaining  sports talk show similar to PTI, so this sounded like a good fit.

To be honest the show wasn’t quite what I expected.  Dan along with his cohost Stugotz lead a pretty lively group that spends more time discussing random topics than sports.  When they do discuss sports they approach it from a unique angle and go out of their way to challenge the standard thought processes of fans while never taking themselves too seriously.  It makes for a highly entertaining show and one that has had me hooked for a couple of months now.  I listen to the previous days podcast every morning at work and it eats up the first 3 hours of the day so quick my job is almost bearable.

So a few weeks ago I found out Dan also hosted a weekly Q&A session Monday afternoons on the Miami Herald’s website.  I’ve followed a few Q&A chats on ESPN’s website before, and most of them are boring because the hosts will only answer serious questions.  Like a Q&A session should be life and death.  These people need to take lessons from Kevin Smith and not take themselves so seriously.  Fortunately, Dan seems to like to entertain himself while doing these Q&A’s so they are fun to read.

Today Travis and I decided we would bombard the Q&A session with questions mostly posing as various athletes or celebrities… and Dan answered quite a few of them for us.  Here are the highlights of how we wasted nearly an hour and 20 minutes of our day today…

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Submitted by Shawn Kemp from Seattle (Travis)
Q: Hey dan, I’m happy for you and i’mma let you finish. But me or Karl Malone had some of the BEST BACHELOR RUNS OF ALL TIME!!!

A: not like jeter, you didn’t….going to have to go out of sports to find better than jeter, i think….wilt married?

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Submitted by Mark Sanchez from The Jersey Shore (me)
Q: Why when I make a lighthearted joke about my old coach going pro does ESPN act like I was serious? Wasn’t us winning a game a big enough headline?

A: it was funny….i think everyone took it as a joke….i love that two weeks ago the jets coach himself said they weren’t going to the playoffs and now they’re calling their season a success regardless of where it goes from here….funny

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Submitted by Aaron Rodgers from My attempt to kick a football to myself while being sacked (travis)
Q: boom goes the dynamite

A: agreed

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Submitted by Kurt Warner from Arizona (me)
Q: Hey Dan, I’m just curious why when I have games where I have more TD passes than incompletions in the playoffs everyone still goes on about how great Farve is at his age and I don’t get nearly as much love. Can you explain that to me?

A: kurt warner has kind of become a hall of famer, hasn’t he?….i think rodgers had the most amazing season i saw this year….his oline stunk….he was sacked 50 times….can anyone name the yardage passing later in a year of great passers? romo and rodgers and peyton manning and drew brees were all great but the yardage leader with nearly 5,000 yards was…….

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Submitted by Travis from Iowa
Q: Future request for a Goal call – ‘You can call me aaron burr from the way i’m dropping hamiltons!’

A: excellent…..http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3b_7S-sGBo

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Submitted by Manny Pacquiao from Hiding from drug testing (me)
Q: Are you going to say I’m ducking the big fight too?

A: i won’t believe that fight won’t happen until it doesn’t happen….too much money involved….and i know pacquiao has scheduled another fight

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Submitted by Lebron James from Cleveland (me)
Q: Dan… you got any pull at TMZsports? I need to make sure no one is trying to Tiger Woods me.

A: we’re lurking, king….and we’ll get you, and i’ll rail about it, and everyone will ignore me and laugh at me and consume the cotton candy happily….the worst will be when tmz sports ruins someone’s life by outing the first active gay athlete

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Submitted by Nick Saban from Alabama (me)
Q: See my Gatorade bath? What kind of punishment do those two players deserve for trying to knock me out. I think i need to hire Levitt or Leech to handle these situations for me.

A: that was kind of the reaction, wasn’t it?

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Submitted by Janet Reno from Picking my teeth with Elian Gonzales’ femur (travis)
Q: All this talk about Cuban defects is making me hungry!

A: femur, funny word

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Submitted by Josh

Q: Tiger Woods sex tape, your trying to track down a copy aren’t you? Can we get Roy to do a Top Ten Most Wanted Sex Tapes?

A: i have my own personal copy ….Range balls

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Submitted by Woody Hayes from Deep south (Travis)
Q: With the talks about Leach, Levitt and Mangino, we need to settle the score now. Worst treatment of a student/student athlete by a coach. Mangino, Levitt, Leach, myself (Hayes) or the dean of mean Bob Knight? Certainly not Mike Gundy, he’s a man, he’s 40!

A: leavitt, i think……physical and then lying….

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There were a few other ones that have to me taken in the flow of the conversation, like Travis as Captain Kirk and me referencing his cohost pick of the Packer to win the Superbowl.  This will now be our new way to kill Monday afternoons.

Also I highly recommend the podcast, as long as you are okay with a lot of discussion about southern Florida.